wanderings [open]

[Shads]

` ` l i g h t s t a r

I CAN'T ESCAPE THIS HELL
so - many - times - i've - tried
BUT I'M STILL CAGED INSIDE
somebody - get - me - through - this - nightmare
I CAN'T CONTROL MYSELF
so - what - if - you - can - see - the - darkest - side - of - me?
NO ONE WILL EVER CHANGE THIS ANIMAL I HAVE BECOME
help - me - believe - it's - not - the - real - me

The day was not that great. It was rainy and cold and windy and let's face it. Lightstar is not one to be out and about to be looking for some lost kit if it wasn't important. And it was. Some apprentices had told him that there was a kit crying for help near some trees at the edge of the territory, and he had no warriors to spare to go looking, so he decided he would. And now, he was beginning to think that it was all a joke. The apprentices would get when he got back, he would make sure of that. But while he was out, he took the time to think and ponder about things. Of course, there wasn't really much he could ponder about that he could fix, but hey. They didn't mean anything. He was a thinker and a worrier, and he would worry until his little heart decided not to. With a great sigh, the tom cat tried his best to think positive. That's all you could do these days.

Of course, not like any of this really matters.

Because soon the world will be washed anew and life will start back over. That's what he liked most about newleaf. Was that it gave everything a chance. A chance to recognize the significance of life and how beautiful it all really was. Newleaf brought joy back into lives and smiles back to faces. Not that he felt any of this. But his warriors did, and that's all that mattered, right? As long as his warriors were happy and his clan was thriving, that's all that mattered. His emotions, or lack there of rather, was nothing. They were little things in the grand scheme of the world. They were but a grain of sand on a beach, to put it simply.

So as the tom walked along, pondering in his thoughts, he realized that he was rather wet. The rain was only but a drizzle, but he must have been out for a while. He had to get back to camp, in case something happened. Panic didn't sweep through him and cause him to rush home, though. Rather he simply changed course and began a slow trot through the territory to the place he called home.

[muse] ehh.
[word count] 382.
[music] none.
[comments] none.

[- Shadow]

Shadowfall

The large tom hissed at the rain as it soaked into his long, tuxedo fur. He had come when he had heard a kit was out here, but had yet to find it. He started to think it a trick, when he heard a sound. He stopped, and flicked his ears to find where it had come from. Then he seen a pile of rocks. He slowly moved closer, his slender frame drenched. He looked half starved, but in truth, he was healthy. His long legs were covered in mud as the rain kept falling. Then he heard it again, a small, almost silent cry. It had to be a kit.

He rushed forward, hoping to find it, but when he got to the rocks, there was nothing. He snarled his nose, disgusted at the whole thing. He started to turn and leave, when the cry was back. It seemed to echo, but how in this rain? Now he was sure that it came from around the rocks. He started to look closer, when he noticed a small whole in the center, sheltered in a cave live fashion from the rocks around it. He called softly, trying to gently coax out the kit.

Suddenly a small, soaked and muddy bundle fell out of the den. He looked at it and his heart broke. It looked almost dead, and he wasn't sure it would make the trip back to Windclan. Gently he picked up the kit in his jaws, and started back. He prayed to Starclan that they would spare the kit, but he could feel the cold, limp body in his jaws. Every now and then the kit would fight for breath, but was otherwise life-less.

About halfway back to camp, he spotted another cat headed back too. After a moment, he was able to make out Lightstar's shape in the rain. He hurried to catch the Windclan leader as they kept moving toward Windclan. With the kit in his mouth, he was unable to call out, but still he wondered if Lightstar had been looking for the kit he now held in his mouth?